Friday, December 21, 2012

The Jim Panzee and Friends Funtime Radio Hour

Five years ago I made a comedy album that was a satirical look at radio programming in the 1930's and 40's. To paraphrase Rowlf the Dog, "I bought one and my mom bought one. Where were you?"

So in the spirit of the season of giving, I've uploaded the entire album for your listening pleasure on YouTube. Will this hurt online sales of the album? Well, I'll have to take the chance of going from 0% sales to -38%.

Enjoy or don't. It's free.

Wednesday, November 28, 2012

Happy Birthday from Humpty Dumpty!

So two things that made this come together:

A.) I'm currently working on a new "Humpty Dumpty" cartoon.
B.) When a friend's birthday arrives, I usually e-mail or post some birthday-related video on Facebook (Elvis, Beatles, Garfield, Three Stooges, Stevie Wonder, etc.)

It only took a day to finish from writing to completed animation, but I wanted to make something amusing that I - and others, obviously - could pass on to friends to give them a smile, chuckle, or disappointment on their birthday. For me, the other stuff just wasn't cutting it. So here it is, a birthday greeting from Humpty Dumpty (my version of the character, of course) that we can all use for shitz and gigglez:

Sunday, November 18, 2012

Insta-Mas: Christmas in a Box!

A few years ago I wrote several sketches for what would be a Christmas-themed comedy CD. I started creating my little cartoons and scrapped that idea completely. In past years I have pulled out those scripts and created Milty the Snowman, Mrs. Claus Wants a Baby, and last year's Jingle Dogs Reunion was an idea totally reworked.

This year I selected another one of these sketches, but this time it was because it seemed to relate to my situation this year. This is my first Thanksgiving without any family nearby. For many that's probably not the worst thing in the world, and it's not for me, either, it's just different. So I felt this was a fitting cartoon to make this time. Hope you enjoy. As always, happy bidding!

Tuesday, November 6, 2012

The Chocolate Therapist

I have done my first commercial for a local chocolatier here in Littleton, CO called The Chocolate Therapist. Let me know what you think, or don't. Don't let me bully you into making opinions.

Thursday, November 1, 2012

Talkin' Shit

Most of my cartoons are fairly tame as far as the language goes (save for the Gritty's Family Buffet and Strip Bar cartoons), but sometimes a little cursing goes a long way. Well, in this new cartoon's case: a lot of cursing goes a long way.

In my everyday life, the expletives fly fast and furious, but I do try and keep it out of my material because I do think it makes for lazy writing. But sometimes you have to curse to make the funny more effective. Crap, poop, doody, poopoo, feces... They just wouldn't have worked as well in this case, I think.

Of course, in the end, if you're just offended by cursing then I suggest one of two things:
A.) Don't watch.
B.) Grow up.

Friday, October 26, 2012

Why Colorado?

So I made the decision to move out of Tennessee and into the baron wasteland that is Colorado. For weeks I was asked "Why Colorado?" so often that I thought it might be the start of a good marketing campaign for the state. "Why Colorado?" "Bingo nights!" "Coyote Wrestling!" "Disneyland!" Then show clips of people shouting random things while an example of what they're yelling goes on behind them.

What really gets me is that I was being asked why I'm moving, as if there was a boon of activity in TN. How could I ever leave that Shangri-La decorated in wood paneling and lined with billboard advertisements from God himself? Obviously, I didn't appreciate just how great the 1950's were.

But I am, indeed, gone for good. Not having any want or desire to go back in time both literally and figuratively. I came here to see if my little cartoon-making and voice skills can find room to grow and possibly get some attention. It's not that I'm craving a spotlight, but I think the material I put out is of quality and it's time for it to get noticed instead of lost in the shuffle with things like this: Maybe I think too highly of what I do, but if I don't, who will?

Since I've moved here over Labor Day Weekend, I've met many terrific, supportive people. It's nice to be in a place where your personality is appreciated and not perceived to be that of a heretic. No one (at least to my face) has looked at my cartoons and said, "You sure you're not supposed to be on meds?"

So what's the big idea? Why Colorado? Well, instead of the long list of reasons why I didn't/couldn't live in other places, I wanted to see if I could offer animation/voice services to small businesses that never thought they could use animation for promotional or corporate purposes (presentations, advertising, etc.). Hey, it's an idea and one that doesn't seem to have too much competition out here. Also, the artistic/creative scene is much healthier here than where I was. I've yet to see anyone stick a paint brush up their nose in a state of confusion. I'll give it a few more weeks.

The one thing that's been a drawback so far is that I left some good female performers behind. Now I have to search for new gals that may be up for this kind of thing. Or maybe I can just get that surgery done I've been talking about for the past few years. Soon, say hello to Michelle.

Let's see how soon it takes for me to start sobbing and sucking my thumb in fear.

Wednesday, October 24, 2012

Please, Lord, Give Me Another!

A few days back I promised my "love letter" to the Southeastern U.S. in the form of a new cartoon. What follows is my spiritual cleansing.

Sunday, October 14, 2012

An Emotional Enema

It's been nearly four months since I've made any new cartoons. So what have I been doing in that time? Well, I decided to end nearly a quarter-century of misery and move from Chattanooga, TN to Denver, CO. The time had come: I lost the family and a great job that was keeping me there. So I decided to sell the house, the furniture, and load up the truck (Prius) and move to Bev-er-lee... Denver, that is. Needless to say, I've been distracted. Also, I'll pass on a bit of advice for those of you looking to move 1,300+ miles away: Don't haul a trailer on the back of a Prius. Sure, it sounds like a fun idea, but don't let the idea fool you.

Another great feature of moving much further away from your current location is that everyone will feel the need to buy you food. So if you want free meals from your friends, pick a far-away place to move to (I'd say over at least two states), let everyone know about it, then watch the donations roll in. I think that if you decide you just want to do this for the freebies, you should be gone for at least 6 months before you come back and let everyone know you "made a big mistake." They'll be none-the-wiser and you'll have had weeks of free food (assuming you have friends).

Now I'm (somewhat) settled in and ready to get back to producing projects that dozens of people will enjoy. I've got plenty of material to keep me busy. There's the final two episodes of Will Rescue for Food, a second Beatles cartoon that I've been wanting to get going on for the past two years, a new Humpty Dumpty episode, and a few one-off ideas. But the first one I'm going to start with is my love letter (AKA: Screw You) to rural America. More specifically: the southeast U.S. It's the "goodbye" that I need to get out of my system, then I can move on mentally since the physical has been accomplished.

I look to have this first piece done before the month is over, so wait with baited breath until then. Much like when a new iPhone is released, I know you'll be in a state of confused anticipation, but try to find time to eat and stay hydrated.

Saturday, June 23, 2012

Breakfast Politics: Reheated

This is the first (and hopefully only) time I've remade one of my cartoons. I'm not big on revisiting old material, I think you should leave what's done as done and keep progressing forward. But in the case of this cartoon, there were a couple of factors for the redo.

 A.) I was never happy with the style I felt the "Eat Healthy, Kids!" style would be more effective in the "comedy delivery" department. B.) I wanted to have symmetry in any sketch I do that involves talking food. You never know when you might do a cross-over. C.) I would possibly like to do more with these characters at some point and don't want to change a style of any subsequent cartoons that don't even look close to the first one.

The worst that happens is people think of me as a George Lucas-type that keeps tinkering with his already-long-finished work. I promise to never insert Hayden Christensen into any cartoons (remakes or otherwise). Hope you enjoy!

Friday, June 22, 2012

The Jim Panzee and Friends Funtime Radio Hour

It's a well-known secret that I released two comedy CD's. The first one consisted of material I turned into my first DVD, while the second one was pretty much made just for an audible experience. The Jim Panzee and Friends Funtime Radio Hour satirizes the radio programs of the 1930's and 40's by telling the history of a fictional children's program. For those that enjoy the safe-haven of political correctness, this project isn't for you. For the rest of you, feel free to sample it for yourself.

Thursday, May 24, 2012

Cooking with the Lazy Chef: Episode 5

The "Lazy Chef" sketches typically don't have any outside influence when they're written. This particular episode is actually based off a demonstration a classmate gave in a speech class (although he did have the materials with him). This was our final speech for the class and was supposed to last 10-12 minutes. Needless to say, he didn't do well. I think he thought offering the teacher an ice cream float was bribery enough to get a passing grade.

Wednesday, May 2, 2012

Eat Healthy, Ya Jerk! ("Eat Healthy, Kids!" Part 2)

As promised, here's the followup to Eat Healthy, Kids! As usual, what drove me to make this was anger and disgust (either or is what makes for the best comedy, I say) and I tend to get driven to create when fueled by both or either of the two. This made me think: Most of my material comes from a negative feeling. Am I unable to produce something that doesn't have cynicism or anger at its core? If it wasn't for the Beatles cartoon I did (and another I'm currently working on), I'd say that thought is true. I have such disappointment and exhaustion with society that the bulk of my work springs from negative feelings. I guess it's healthier than violence. I wish everyone would have an outlet for their frustrations like I do.

Tuesday, April 24, 2012

Eat Healthy, Kids! 2

Three years ago I set out to make a piece that satirizes the old PSA films of the 50's. They're fun to look back on for their simplistic take on topics like nuclear war and social interaction and also as a marker as to where we were as a society: What was acceptable and "the norm" in the mainstream line of thinking. Today, everyone everywhere has to be coddled to, there's no way something like those films get produced without at least eight-dozen special-interest groups chiming in on what's wrong with them per their needs.

So I liked the idea of making something that obviously pokes fun at that time when not much was questioned because "If it's presented to me through entertainment, it must be true." Not unlike the Troy McClure "educational" segments on The Simpsons.

Well, apparently the line between education and satire has been blurred enough because since I posted Eat Healthy, Kids! 3 years ago, I've had a non-stop stream of comments from brilliant minds claiming the piece skews the facts (From the cartoon: "Do you know one serving of ice cream has 5,000 grams of fat and 12,000 grams of saturated fat?!") and doesn't teach kids to eat healthy at all! In fact, "you guys are assholes posing as children's material. very unsuitable and you fucking well know it!" (this from a genius that obviously doesn't have time to read credits, a video description, or understand the irony behind defending entertainment aimed at children by using multiple expletives).

Not only that, but then there are people that taut the cartoon as being a perfect demonstration to children for the facts on healthy eating. They've posted it on children's blogs, health blogs, educational sites, etc. So either way you go with your view on the piece, you're just not getting the point: It's satire. I.E.: Not to be taken seriously. I either did a really bad job at executing this idea or people are just so brain-dead that they can't discern for themselves what is real anymore. Spoon-feeding an audience is not up my alley.

Then a couple of days ago I received this comment:
"Ok I am a teacher looking for an fun video clip to look at healthy eating and typed in "Healthy eating cartoon for children and this rubbish came up!Out of order! And not funny! "

And with that, I'm now writing a sequel to Eat Healthy, Kids! entitled Eat Healthy, Ya Jerk! This will be my interpretation of the audience the first cartoon received and overall those that take things at face-value without ever questioning what they may be thinking is off-the-mark. I never intended to do a followup. The piece was just supposed to be a one-off idea and I'd move on. But, as always, the best comedy comes from anger and/or disgust, and I've just reached that point where there's a need for an outlet to express my eye-rolling attitude to these "last of the great thinkers."

Here's the original. Feel free to be outraged by the blatant, misleading propaganda I've created:

Monday, February 20, 2012

Coffee Comfort w/ Commentary by Humpty Dumpty

William H. Dumpty (Humpty) was asked to do a commentary on one of his cartoons! (In reality, he wasn't asked, I just thought it'd be fun to do a commentary in-character.) Listen to a cartoon character explain what it takes to make a short feature! Hey... HEY! Did you know you could be his damn friend on Facebook? Well ya can. Click here to enter that life-changing door!